Sunday, January 08, 2006

Hey! You Wanna Hear A Story?

Saturday night I ventured up to Mattandriver's neighborhood for a night on the town. Unfortunately, Dean's flight changed and he couldn't join us. Next time, for sure!!

Besides meeting MandR's lovely wife, I got to meet another member of Mattandriver's family....River! I think he and I may be dating. I got a fair share of kisses on the lips from him!

So MandR and wife and I started out at the Hotel Edison. Very old and very groovy hotel in town. It all started off innocently enough there as we sat down at the bar. But, within minutes, everything changed. MandR's very close friend (he probably won't admit it but I could tell the two of them go way back) Jeff was at the bar. I think everyone in this town was named Jeff. To start off Jeff gave us his recipe for the very best french fries: a lot of ketchup (my kinda guy), salt and....drum roll please....pepper. I know you are all reading this with baited breath....so were we. But, that's all there was to Jeff's version of the world's best french fries!

That was just Jeff's way of getting his foot in the door. The rest of the stories that night started out "Hey, you wanna hear another one?" All the while his eyes were sparkling and wild. The bartender described it best....he was Beetlejuice...sounded like him, similar expressions...so keep that in mind! Jeff continued with stories about his tree cutting days. One day in particular when he was particularly hung over and the temps outside were 150 degrees. He was pruning an apple tree for a woman and she asked if she could get him anything. He said "yes, a glass of ice water would be great." So, the old lady went inside and came outside with a flyswatter and began to whack Jeff about the head with it. When he asked her what she was doing, she said she thought he needed to keep the bugs off of him. He said "no you crazy old woman I asked for ice water, not flyswatter!" I'm almost sure it was at that point that the three of us were uncontrollably hysterical which resulted in MandR's wife spilling her drink.

We then moved on to another bar, and then finally Dan's Den where the bass was pumpin! We were doing "social profiling" as MandR liked to call it. And discovered a young man that knew every word to every song. Apparently he has lots of time on his hands! Periodically he would go out and dance with his entourage of women. As the night wore on, and the three of us got more daring, MandR double-dogged dared me to go ask this guy to dance. Which resulted in the classic statement of the evening. MandR said, "If you go out there and dance with him, I'll go out and grind his ass." And there you have it folks. Need I say anything more??

And today I got an unexpected visit from Dean after all. He needed to take a friend to the airport so there I was in the front seat of a pick up sandwiched between two soldiers. Could life get any better?

9 comments:

Unknown said...

I wish I had an all female entourage. or however you spell it.

mattandriver said...

At least you keep to your word……..

mattandriver said...

I also add this for clarification purposes only……


1)“The” Jeff is not a close friend.

2) My real name is Jeff. No shit.

Anonymous said...

Front seat...soldier sandwich? Oh HELLO BETTY!

Bone said...

Anytime you go to a party and there's a tree cutter there, plant yourself around him. You'll hear the most hilarious stories.

Groovy? Bass was pumpin? You crack me up. What decade are you from anyway?

rev. billy bob gisher ©2008 said...

yes matt but did you?

mattandriver said...

I think this whole thing’s a setup. I don’t remember any of it. (Ok, I lie!)

Thanks for reminding me how to have a good time. We’ll have to do it again!

MarkD60 said...

Sounds like you had fun!
I've only met one fellow blogger in real life.

Unknown said...

Hey, I tagged you on my blog. You got some writin to do, young woman.