Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Reality is Overrated!
I got this from Lass's blog and I'm also going to take the cheap way out of a post today and use this. I think I know who will shock me and who will make me laugh, so let's see if you can prove me right or wrong. :) If you read this, and you happen to have a few seconds and a dollop of creativity to spare, please post a comment with a completely made up (read: FICTIONAL) memory of you and me. It can be anything you want - good or bad - but it has to be fake.When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people don't actually remember about you. Try it, it's fun
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6 comments:
How about I actually tell about a true story on your blog.
We'll call it "Carney and the Cage"
Imagine, if you will, one of those bars where the floor actually thumps with the bass line of the music. Overhead, cages with women, scantily clad, little chemises and fish nets, go go boots. You're with your son, he comes back from the bar with drinks for you. (what a nice kid, takes his mom out drinking) He jerks his head back over his shoulder at the cages...shouts over the music, "Hey, I didn't know your friend, Carney had a Chinese symbol tattooed on her ass"
True story...
Well, lets see if I can remember.
I was travelling through Mexico when I heard about this wild woman in the cantina. It was said that she could out-drink, out-fight, and out-hump any guy in the world. Well, I've always been one for a challenge, so I headed over. At the bar was this stunning woman, with a bottle of tequila in both hands and a long knife on her belt. I walked up to her and grabbed one of her bottles and drank it down. She drank the other one down and smashed the bottle over my head. Ow. When I woke up, she was standing over me, fighting off four banditos with that knife of hers. She took them all down, then grabbed me around the neck and hauled me to my feet. She kissed me hard, then threw me over her shoulder and carried me to the back room, where she tossed me on this old army cot. What happened then is best left to the imagination, but lets just say, I lost 40 lbs and half my hair by the time I escaped the next morning. When I asked her name, she drew her knife and carved the word "Carney" on my left thigh.
The saga continues...
okay, see if you remember this...the night we were geeked on lsd, and hanging out on the railroad tracks. i was pretty grossed out, because you just ate the biggest, rawest piece of prime rib i ever saw, and you licked the plate. well, i just couldn't stand the blood all over you and pushed you in the river. i still need to apologize for laughing as you bobbed over the damn...those damn hallucinigenics. anyway, i did rescue you, after the damn, and we went back to the railroad tracks. we lost our virginity that night, remember, hobo bob? you thought he looked like Jim Morrison. okay, just as a reality check for you, he was butt ass ugly, but we still did him! never again!
Well, as I remember, you were riding across the country in a car with this runner girl from Texas. I had just been dropped off on the side of the road after a wild night on board the Banlges tour bus. (And oddly, was walking somewhat like an Egyptian.)
So you two picked me up. We all got high and I don't remember very much after that. I just remember you kept yelling "big boy" so I thought you wanted to go to Shoney's. Then it seems like just as we were just about to enter "Paradise City," you began babbling about a wild night you had with some guy named Coyote Mike.
So as soon as the runner girl slowed down to take the next curve, I dove out of the car.
wait a minute neil young? i mean i love the guy, i own harvest and have created a child or two with it playing in the background, but neil young? er, don't you think he might upset a few people on the right, as well as dishonest ones on the left? hey it's your/findleys vote. who am i to challenge?
when did findley post that? if ya hear from her tell her i asked for her to drop an email on me. thanks.
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